Seeking Approval

Growing up we believed those we thought knew the secrets of the universe— our parents, our grandparents, our brothers and sisters– were made of perfection. Perfection has the smell of fresh linen and the taste of strawberries with memories we cherished.

We held their opinions, beliefs, and advice in our hands like precious rubies. We passed these shiny stones out like heirlooms to our children and our closest friends. Or to anyone who would listen.

But some of those that knew the secrets of the universe knew nothing. Why did they believe their lies to be truths? Why did we hold on to their words, believing in false clarity?

Their hateful words growing like strong vines, hateful words that we were taught and we shared with others. Unfounded opinions and starving advice that rolled off their tongues and stumbled off ours.

As we aged and life grew around us, we formed priceless relationships with diverse humans with beautiful cultures. We replaced the tarnished rubies with fresh earth and fresh dirt. We replaced them with something sustainable and something real.

We stopped craving blood’s approval and started adorning our lives with streams, lakes, and oceans.

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28 thoughts on “Seeking Approval”

  1. Wow such a beautiful post ❤️ You are so right. We believe everything when we are younger. After that we begin to think for ourselves and analyse if everything is true which of course isn’t. Your writing style is beautiful ❤️

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  2. We all do the best we can. My parents screwed a few things up, but I’ve seen worse. I make countless mistakes talking to mine.
    I hope they’ll appreciate how I tried; how I love them, and we’ll all accept our humanity. 🙂

    Beautiful post, by the way.

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    1. I agree, I think most do. This actually isn’t about my parents but it is about family. Even though my childhood wasn’t perfect, my parents always accepted me for me. And they taught me love instead of hate. Some of my family taught me prejudices and hateful thinking. I’m just glad that I grew out of that thinking. ❤ Thank you for your awesome comment!

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      1. All that matters is that you’re doing what’s best for your family! I have other parts of my family that view other aspects of my life (I don’t have kids yet) badly. But I remind myself that I’m doing what’s best for me! It doesn’t matter what they think!

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  3. This was a brilliant post that holds SO much truth! When i was younger, I learned a lot from my mother. The things I learned from her was what NOT to do because everything she did was a huge screw up and she still behaves the same now. The only person I ever believed was telling the honest truth was my grandfather. I guess at least I had one person to believe in. To this day, even though he has passed away, I try to live my life in his footsteps.

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    1. I feel you. Some of my family taught me some awful prejudices (not my parents in this regard) & hateful things that I believed growing up because I thought they were superheroes & gods. The more I grew up, the more I saw what bullshit some of it was.

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      1. It is amazing what our own family may believe and yet we are so different. I said to my mother the other day, “It is okay, you can tell me I was adopted because there is no way I came from you”. She is a Trump supporter, so you can imagine my frustrations!

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  4. Beautiful thoughts and vistas of the mind here. I like the nature elements. I hope this is a step in the right direction to expressing yourself easier….good to strip it all back.
    Thanks for posting this!

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  5. Then we learnt how to really seek exactly what we feel. We approved our mistakes and well doings. We embraced them with happiness. We can now smile at ourselves saying, ” now this is me, am living through”

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