Trapped by Social Anxiety

I’ve always struggled with anxiety. For as long as I can remember, anxiety has ruled my life and it’s controlled my inner dialogue. My anxious thoughts remind me I’m inferior and they convince me everyone is judging me.

Anxiety decides I need to try on 50 outfits before I head out the door. Anxiety decides I won’t be able to join conversations out of fear. Anxiety tells me it’s safer inside. Anxiety is always lying to me.

I’m stoned face on the outside, heart pounding, and pulse racing on the inside. I get this strange sensation of choking on my own breath.

The past year and a half, my social anxiety has escalated. I’ve had every excuse in the book not to see friends or take a trip to the store. Checking Facebook messages is overwhelming.

I’ve stuck to the comfort of my bed and the internet.

My psychiatrist prescribed me buspirone. I’m meant to take it 3 times a day.  I did for the first month but I’d sleep all day long so I only take one before bed.

I’ve also developed some healthy coping mechanisms these past few months. I wrote about them in a post on my writer website, 8 Tips for Social Anxiety. If you’re interested, head over there and check it out. I hope it helps someone else struggling with anxiety because I know it’s been an on-going battle for me.

I also came across this article on the correlation between gut health and anxiety, If You Have Anxiety, a Study Says Taking Care of Your Gut Bacteria Might Help. Interesting stuff.

We have the strength to fight our anxiety. It’s not easy and even in recovery, we’re not cured. Gotta keep on keeping on.


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15 thoughts on “Trapped by Social Anxiety”

  1. Casey, you and I are a lot alike in ways. Give me my bed and laptop, I’m all good. I just discontinued my Facebook account entirely, yesterday. I’m so done with social networking! It added to my depression and anxiety as if I had to always have something to add to someone else’s story, then get guilt if I didn’t. I’m inspired by your post!!!

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    1. Thank you, Beckie! And we do, cus I can live in my bed. Lol. I only keep my social media around for my blog & because I don’t have a phone so it’s my only way to stay in touch with a few close friends. But I don’t get on everyday anymore.

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  2. I feel the same way. Anxiety is such a hell to live with. We are all in this together 💪 I’m here for you and sending you lots of love. I find it hard to face my fears because I would rather stay in my comfortzone and hide from everything which makes me anxious.

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  3. Anxiety can be so debilitating. :/ But as you mentioned there seems to be some awesome research on the correlation between gut health and mental health. Seems very promising! Hoping you find a comfortable balance for yourself and thank you for sharing this part of your life, it really helps to know others out there have the same things going on behind closed doors. 🌼

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  4. I think that some social media platforms have escalated this in so many people. Well done for confronting it by writing about it.
    I am retired from work on a pension, so do not donate to bloggers, but I do appreciate you following my blog.
    Best wishes, Pete.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for reading! And I agree, social media has created anxiety for many people. It’s weird how we feel the need to paint perfect pictures of our lives & post everything. I’ve been guilty of it myself. But now, most social media platforms just annoy me!

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