When Mental Health Stifles Creativity

The Bipolar Writer Collaborative Mental Health Blog

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I must walk through a door once again on this journey— a door to a new psychiatrist.

It seems that change is always in store for me, and to end 2018 that has not changed much.

I have not written in a while here on The Bipolar Writer blog, because it has been a rough couple of weeks. My life has hit a rough patch with my social anxiety, which is typical of this time of the year. December seems to always be my worst month when it comes to my anxiety. There was hope at the start of 2018 that by now I would have a grasp on my social anxiety. It hasn’t happened though I have made some progress.

I recently met with another psychiatrist in the revolving door that is my local county run behavioral, mental health system. It is a pain in the ass to…

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Is mental illness more of a reason or an excuse?

Mental Health @ Home

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This post was inspired by a recent post on Mindless Overthinking about the psychology behind excuses.  I left a comment about distinguishing between reasons and excuses, and I thought the idea was worth some further expansion.

The Oxford English Dictionary includes many definitions for “reason”, but these are the most relevant for this purpose:

A cause, ground, or motive

  • Of a fact, event, or thing not dependent on human agency

It defines an excuse as:

That which is offered a reason for being excused; sometimes in a bad sense, a (mere) pretext, a subterfuge

  • A plea for release from a duty, obligation, etc.

The differences may be subtle, but I think they’re actually really important.  The word excuse carries with it a lot of negative overtones.  It sounds like an attempt to get out of something that you really should be doing but just don’t want to…

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Finally Took My Own Advice

I've been stuck between a deep, deep grave of depression, unable to bring myself out of bed. Other days I'm brimming with energy that I can't do much with because my muscles ache, my bones twitch, and my feet burn. Now that I have insurance again, I decided to take my own advice. I'm getting… Continue reading Finally Took My Own Advice

Placing Blame and Assigning Guilt

One of my biggest inner struggles with bipolar disorder is fighting the urge to blame myself for every outside conflict with others. How the hell am I suppose to know whether my angry outburst was valid or if I was overreacting because my brain is at war? It stems from the overused phrases used all… Continue reading Placing Blame and Assigning Guilt

Seeking Approval

Growing up we believed those we thought knew the secrets of the universe-- our parents, our grandparents, our brothers and sisters-- were made of perfection. Perfection has the smell of fresh linen and the taste of strawberries with memories we cherished. We held their opinions, beliefs, and advice in our hands like precious rubies. We… Continue reading Seeking Approval